B2B Sales, Lead Generation and Marketing Blog

Just for Fun: 10 B2B Holiday Sales Jokes

Posted by Vendere Team on Tue, Nov 27, 2012 @ 07:11 AM

Q1 is a strong buying time. Don’t let the challenges that the holidays present deter you from giving your all when it comes to marketing your B2B products and services this holiday season.Snowman: holiday sales jokes By launching vigorous sales and marketing campaigns in December, you just might be able to outdo the competition in January.

Need a chuckle or two to help you get through the end of the year? Just for fun, here are 10 B2B holiday sales jokes, courtesy of Vendere Partners:

1. Sales reps see bad leads lists the way that turkeys see stuffing—as a clear indication that their futures are limited.

2. A sales manager finally got the message when her team showed up at her front door singing, “Now bring us some freaking new leads” instead of “Now bring us some figgy pudding.”

3. Never make your sales reps dress up as elves for your company’s holiday photo. It gives them low elf-esteem.

4. A provider of logistics and supply chain software made the mistake of holding its annual “How to Out-Ship the Competition” tech event on December 25th. Sadly, the only attendees were The Tooth Fairy, The Easter Bunny, a giant cornucopia, Cupid, three witches, a stuffed groundhog, an April fool, Christopher Columbus, and a handful of leprechauns, none of whom had bank accounts.

5. You know you’ve hired the wrong B2B lead generation firm when they send you lists of leads that are scored not as hot, warm, or in need of nurturing, but as naughty or nice.

6. It should be a relief to you to know that during the holidays, leads never get stuck in sales funnels; they get stuck in sales chimneys.

7. Tele-marketers are like fruitcakes; no one seeks them out, but they’ll go ahead and bite if the presentation is right.

8. Imagine Rudolph’s horror when he recently found out that the all of the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names as a direct result of an e-marketing smear campaign launched by a fluorescent lighting manufacturer.

9. What do you call a group of gift wrappers that can tie up leads in a bow and deliver them to you weekly, daily, or hourly via almost any Web-enabled, mobile device? -Your new B2B lead generation partners.

10. Out of desperation, a sales rep e-mailed Santa and asked for more quality leads. Santa e-mailed back, “I believe I received your e-mail in error. The e-mail address you really need is sales@venderepartners.com. Merry Christmas!”

Topics: demand generation, cold calling

RFI tips for b2b lead generation appointment setting